I feel that I've come tantalizingly close to love and rockets a couple of times this year, but that they eluded me just when I thought I had them in hand. I was talking to Abi about it after the panto last night, and she told me she though I had changed a lot in the past year, becoming more open and transparent, and that this would eventually win me what I want. However, single status has been a stubbornly persistent feature of my life, and I always come back around to the idea that I must value solitude and a sense of wonder more than a romantic connection. But who knows, maybe I can follow my confusion into a combination of the things I yearn for. Love in the time of Cancer, to paraphrase Gabriel Garcia Marquez.